so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
Randomize
