I woke up this morning in your mom's car... any ideas?
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
new rule: cockblock me if I have had over a fifth of jack. no matter what.
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
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