I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
After I tried for five minutes to hang my beer from the coat hanger in the bathroom , I have realized I am drunk
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
I was going through my paperwork and I found the lifetime warranty card for my 14" dildo. I saved it. You know, just in case.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
Sorry about my sloppy drunk texts. I'm not sure talking about banging a near dead Jimmy Stewart was my finest moment
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
Randomize
