Maybe i shouldn't have told him the key to getting in my pants was double vodka sodas and Nelly's song "grillz."
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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