no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
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