i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
Randomize
