It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
some girl just asked me if I was that guy that hooked up with nine girls in one night. officially a local celebrity. gonna try and autograph her boobs.
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
Randomize
