I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
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