just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
just passed out while on hold to see if i left my debit card at the bar last night.
I got spanked with a cardboard tube. Apparently he used to be a percussionist. Who favored marching band tunes. It was weird.
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
Randomize
