Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
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