would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
He's a Shit stain on my heart
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
Speaking of which.. there's underwear in my backseat and Arby's cheese sauce on my door handle. So much for my new Volvo bringing out my classy side.
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
Randomize