i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
It's not mothers day until you're vomitting syrup into grandma's toilet. Cherish the holidays
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
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