i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
Kristen just told everyone at the bar that I've got a huge dick, now Brittany is giving me the eye. What is the opposite of FML?
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
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