I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
just because you dressed up as a brontosaurus doesn't mean you can poop in my yard and roar at my neighbors
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
Randomize