wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
Randomize
