he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
just used my amazon order history to figure out my anniversary. I am the most epic/shittiest bf ever...
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
Randomize
