Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
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