thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
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