I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
Randomize
