why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
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