I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
Look, all I'm sayin is $2 boilermakers and an expense account are probably a bad mix…
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
