is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
Randomize
