I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
What's grosser: using a dirty sex towel as an oven mitt? or using the oven to reheat superbowl bean dip for dinner?
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
Randomize
