he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
I recorded his orgasm, set it as his ringtone, and called him while they were singing happy birthday to his mom. Yeah, revenge is sweet.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
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