garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
She told me at midnight she would blow me harder than a new years party kazoo
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
Randomize
