it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
Randomize