Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
Are you drunk? You left me a voicemail at 5:59 AM of you making dolphin sounds.
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
Randomize
