Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
Randomize
