so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
yeah, you could tell they werent used to the strange things that i say. they were all outright shocked when i told one guy i hoped someone kidnapped him and stretched his dickhole over a fire hydrant
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
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