Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day ðŸ˜ðŸ’€#pensacolaproblems
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