ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
rolled in at 7am w/ 2 girls i met at the strip club. my neighbor was getting up to mow the lawn before he took his kids to school. i'm 31. he's younger. if given the chance, you think he'd want to switch places?
My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
my grandma just informed me that patrick swayze used to babysit my dads cousins why wasn't i informed of this early...like when i was obsessed with dirty dancing!
I'm pissed I'm finding this out at 24 bc i could have used this material to make friends
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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