I was to big spoon the shit out of you right now
I'm so hungover and dru,k
I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
Randomize
