Have you finally orgasmed yet?
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
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