Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
Randomize
