break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
Randomize
