Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
You're 31, how do you still outdrink all these college kids?
Practice, Irish genes, and a lack of desire to live past 40. But mostly practice.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Randomize