I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
Randomize
