and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
Randomize
