Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
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