How crunk are you?
I'm a Tom Selleck. Zero being Tipper Gore and max being the Bush twins
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Randomize
