didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
i celebrated the independence of our country by dry heaving tequila all morning. so classy. happy 4th.
Considering that my ex-wife dumped me to become a lesbian, the Universe owes me a threesome.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
Noooo. I told you she WAS a cancer. Not that she HAS cancer. This was the one time being a doctor didnt get you laid you alcoholic bastard
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
Randomize
