yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
last night I used snow as a chaser
Randomize
