the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
I know ur sleeping, sorry for waking you but i just saw a girl with mittens on using her nose to control her ipod touch
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
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