Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
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