I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
My dog just blew me a kiss. First of all I'm stoned and second of all he's a pitbull. Those aren't sexual dogs. So wtf.
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