Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
Randomize
