: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
He could only go see Deadpool without his girl if he was black-out drunk... because spoilers. They're the perfect couple.
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
Randomize
