We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
The squirrels are partying on my roof again. Now they're just rubbing it in that I'm home alone on a Saturday night and they're having orgies.
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
Randomize
