Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
It was a new level of awkwardness and terror. The high schoolers you fuck in the summer should never introduce themselves to your mom and godmother
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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