Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize
