I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
a bus full of elementary school kids may or may not have seen me pissing off my front porch this morning
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
Turns out vomit takes off spray tan.
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
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