i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
